Tuesday, 21 September 2010
How To Tell If You Are A Hard Core Greenie
Written by Gavin Webber
So, how do you spot a hard core greenie or tree-hugger? Well I did some thinking on the way home and came up with a list!
1. You know the intricate details of every green issue.
There isn’t a single environmental issue or piece of environmental legislation that has escaped your grasp. From NGERS to the CPRS (now defunct), you have read them all. You know a little more than just, say, that climate change is a bad thing. You can describe the process of the greenhouse effect and can count carbon emissions using the National Greenhouse Factors book. In fact, you took a course on how to count carbon emissions!
2. You’re an active member of environmental organisations or green community groups
You take an active role in the environmental protection of your community and beyond, by protesting the destruction of forest land, planting trees where they previously have been destroyed, and love educating others about the perils of abusing the environment. Extra hard core points for starting your own group!
3. You’ve boycotted businesses that have harmed the Planet
You stopped buying food made by Nestle because of their use of unsustainable palm oil and deforestation. You shudder when you have to buy petrol from BP, and think of the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico when you see their logo. When you open your pantry, there are more eco-labels than plain ones, all fully researched to ensure that there is no greenwash in their marketing. You even wipe your bum with recycled toilet paper as your own personal protest about Gunns and old growth forests!
4. You keep it natural when it comes to food and clothing
When you open your pantry or fridge, all that stares back at you are whole foods bought in bulk. Processed foods rarely touch your lips, and a fair proportion of your food comes from your garden. You rarely eat meat and if you do it is ethically raised and slaughtered. You aren’t a stranger to hemp, and wear clothes made from the fiber. Organic cotton also features heavily in your wardrobe. Hands up those of you with hemp socks and undies?
5. Your home is entirely eco-friendly
Your home is equipped with all kinds of eco-friendly upgrades, like low energy appliances and light bulbs, dual-flush toilets, low-flow showerheads and perhaps solar panels and solar hot water. You use your air conditioner and heater sparingly, and they’ve never been on full-blast. You ensure that your home doesn’t waste any energy, and its CO2 footprint is minuscule compared to others around you. Extra hard core points for owning a PowerMate or similar device to measure individual appliance consumption!
6. Your rubbish bin has never once held a glass, food waste, plastic or aluminium
You have four bins stationed in your kitchen, and each one holds nothing more than its designated material – Recyclable materials, Compost, Worm Farm, and landfill with the latter being almost empty. You are 100% consistent when it comes to recycling all items, so absolutely no exceptions are made when guests are over. All of your friends know that when they’re in your home, they better put their waste in the right bins- or else.
7. You recycle for other people
When out and about, you stop to pick up recyclable materials in the street, and become incensed when people aren’t properly utilizing public recycling bins. Your work colleagues think you are a fruit loop when you sort their rubbish for them because it is just too farking hard to put that can in the co-mingled recycling bin. You ask your neighbours for their lawn clippings for your chickens and compost bins!
8. You own a hybrid vehicle (if you own a vehicle)
If you own a vehicle, you own a hybrid vehicle. And it might be adorned with a variety of bumper stickers that advertise your greenie style personal beliefs. The rear of your car tells people to “Think Green” and “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.” In short, you fit the stereotype of hybrid drivers. When not in your hybrid, you walk or ride your bike and take public transport everywhere else!
9. You abhor energy wastage
From Four-wheel drives to friends who run their air conditioners on full-blast, you can’t help but shun the energy guzzling arseholes who seem to have little regard for the environment. Perhaps you’ve even lost friends or made enemies because of such lifestyle differences. You just can’t fathom their ignorance pertinent to such an important issue.
10. Walk Against Warming is one of your favourite events
You attend eco-events and protests any chance you get so that you can set an example to others, and so they know that you understand and care about our home, the Earth. In fact any eco-fair is just a wonderful place to be. It is the perfect place to meet other like minded people, spreading the message of environmental responsibility, our effect upon our world and doing your bit to lower your environmental footprint – things greenies or tree-huggers care about.
So what do you think? Have I missed any (besides cheese or soap making), or have I described all of you, and/or myself, down to a tee?